Have you ever had an experience that ended with this thought..
“I will never be the same”
So have I.
I had the enormous privilege of traveling to London for 9 days to serve with a team of Hunter Street Students and adults.
I must admit- in so many ways – I was not expecting such a transformation of my heart.
I have seen the hard hearts of London before.
I was expecting to see the Lord at work in the lives of our students and those that they spoke with...
But you see- He was at work in me.
I tear up every time I think of the people that I encountered.- even those that were just for a moment.
I get a knot in my stomach when I realize how far I am away from them now.
{ It is just over 4,300 miles by the way..}
Each time I stood at a tube stop waiting for our train I found myself staring into the faces of the men and women riding by on their trains.
Face after face- a different story.
Almost impossible to comprehend.
So many times since we have returned I have asked myself
“What now?”
What am I to do with this strong burden that I have brought home with me for a people who are half of a world away?
Last night as I was drifting to sleep I found myself repeating three words to myself that soothed me.
“I will pray. I will pray. I will pray.”
For now- the prayer will be my work with the people of London.
Oh- the power that is in prayer!
Our team saw God at work amongst us by answering very specific prayers last week.
We learned what it looked like to pray without ceasing.
Literally.
All day. Each day.
A lifestyle of prayer.
And you know the neat thing about being in this relentless conversation with our Lord?
You see Him work in such detail.
You are paying attention to His leading.
You are focused and you are attuned to His whisper.
In this reminder of the importance of PRAYER I have gone back to find one of my favorite pieces by J.C. Ryle- “ A Call to Prayer”
Several years ago I made myself a sheet that sat on my bedside table that said..
Pray with Faith
“We should endeavor to believe that our prayers are heard, and that if we ask things according to God’s will, we shall be answered.” (Ryle)
We should cultivate the habit of pleading promises in our prayers!
Pray with Boldness
“One who heard Luther praying said, ‘What a spirit., what a confidence was in his very expressions. With such a reverence he sued, as one begging of God, and yet with such hope and assurance, as if he spoke with a loving father or friend” (Ryle)
Pray with Fullness
“The cause of their weakness in prayer is to be found in their own stunted, dwarfish, clipped, contracted, hurried, narrow diminutive prayers. They have not, because they ask not.” (Ryle)
What strong words!
I will ask that the Lord will fill my prayers with humble requests and sweet praises.
I will ask that the Lord will teach me to pray with reverent boldness.
And I will pray with faith- for our God hears and sees and answers.
Our God saves!
Are your prayers filled with faith, boldness and fullness?
So often we carry along burdens and questions without even considering taking them before the Lord in prayer.
I imagine that on many days the burdens that I try to carry on my own make me look like a prisoner- with heavy shackles and chains that I am trying to drag along on my own.
Imprisoned by life because I am too prideful to pray.
How sweet is it that God looks at us in our weakness and removes these weights and woes from us and hears the cries of our hearts.
So- brothers and sisters- I will pray.
For the people of London. For the people of Hoover.
For my worries. For my fears.
For my dreams. For my deepest sins.
Will you join me in running in the direction of a lifestyle of prayer?
He hears. He sees. He answers.
I will pray.
Monday, April 1, 2013
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Rooted & Established: Knowing Jesus
Time, it seems, has gotten away from me since the last time I had the pleasure of sitting in my chair with a hot cup of coffee and letting the lessons the Lord is teaching me pour out into this boring and gloriously empty white box on my computer screen.
For me- this is therapy.
To put into words the lessons the Lord is in the midst of walking me through.
I- the forever pupil.
He- my great teacher.
The main subject matter as of late has been just this:
The importance of knowing Jesus
Roll with me on this...
Life has been rich and full over the past several months.
Thanksgiving came and went.
And now, too, Christmas has come and gone.
(I type this directly facing my Christmas tree which I am dreading taking down...maybe William won't notice if I leave it up until June-ish??)
What a wonderful Christmas it has been!
Each year my family attends our churches Christmas eve service.
Always a sweet time of worship on the eve of Jesus' birthday.
Each year we sing...
"Joy to the world! The Lord is come!
Let earth receive her King!...
He rules the world with truth and grace
and makes the nations prove the
glories of His righteousness
and wonders of His love!"
As I was singing these words my heart was overwhelmed-
This baby that we are celebrating
This little boy born in Bethlehem-
He is my Jesus.
I know Him well.
I know Him intimately.
He is the joy to the whole wide world-
and my dear savior King.
Of course- there were tears.
God used this infant to alter eternity.
Manhood added to diety.
Come to dwell with us.
Grace upon Grace.
Jesus.
As we look ahead to the new year- many of us (including myself) often come up with a comprehensive list of things we would like to do accomplish in the next 365 days.
{Running more. Weighing less.
Write a book. Call mom more.
etc. etc. etc.}
I get so caught up in getting things done on the list that I miss the lessons that are going on in the midst of it all.
It is best for me to simplify.
To focus.
This year on my list is just one thing:
Treasure Christ
I am trying to focus on Jesus and knowing Him well.
I do not know what the year 2013 will bring along with it when it arrives-
but I do know that when the year 2013 departs that my desire is to look more like Christ and know Him better.
Sure...a longer run, a book and a few less pound wouldn't be too shabby.
But, my friends, there is nothing more satisfying than knowing Christ.
Colossians 2:6-7 says...
"Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him, established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in Thanksgiving"
No matter what the year ahead may bring- may we be found
walking in Christ
rooted and build up in Christ
established in our faith
Knowing Jesus.
My prayer is that we would all make this our main priority in the days ahead.
Happy Christmas and Blessings to you in the new year
-amy
For me- this is therapy.
To put into words the lessons the Lord is in the midst of walking me through.
I- the forever pupil.
He- my great teacher.
The main subject matter as of late has been just this:
The importance of knowing Jesus
Roll with me on this...
Life has been rich and full over the past several months.
Thanksgiving came and went.
And now, too, Christmas has come and gone.
(I type this directly facing my Christmas tree which I am dreading taking down...maybe William won't notice if I leave it up until June-ish??)
What a wonderful Christmas it has been!
Each year my family attends our churches Christmas eve service.
Always a sweet time of worship on the eve of Jesus' birthday.
Each year we sing...
"Joy to the world! The Lord is come!
Let earth receive her King!...
He rules the world with truth and grace
and makes the nations prove the
glories of His righteousness
and wonders of His love!"
As I was singing these words my heart was overwhelmed-
This baby that we are celebrating
This little boy born in Bethlehem-
He is my Jesus.
I know Him well.
I know Him intimately.
He is the joy to the whole wide world-
and my dear savior King.
Of course- there were tears.
God used this infant to alter eternity.
Manhood added to diety.
Come to dwell with us.
Grace upon Grace.
Jesus.
As we look ahead to the new year- many of us (including myself) often come up with a comprehensive list of things we would like to do accomplish in the next 365 days.
{Running more. Weighing less.
Write a book. Call mom more.
etc. etc. etc.}
I get so caught up in getting things done on the list that I miss the lessons that are going on in the midst of it all.
It is best for me to simplify.
To focus.
This year on my list is just one thing:
Treasure Christ
I am trying to focus on Jesus and knowing Him well.
I do not know what the year 2013 will bring along with it when it arrives-
but I do know that when the year 2013 departs that my desire is to look more like Christ and know Him better.
Sure...a longer run, a book and a few less pound wouldn't be too shabby.
But, my friends, there is nothing more satisfying than knowing Christ.
Colossians 2:6-7 says...
"Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him, established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in Thanksgiving"
No matter what the year ahead may bring- may we be found
walking in Christ
rooted and build up in Christ
established in our faith
Knowing Jesus.
My prayer is that we would all make this our main priority in the days ahead.
Happy Christmas and Blessings to you in the new year
-amy
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
That I Should Go
Imagine with me for a moment a young man-
Far from his place of birth.
Exiled from his family.
Tending his flock of sheep in the wilderness.
Suddenly- a great flame appeared and the angel of the Lord spoke to him.
Through a bush.
Ah, Moses.
I have always loved spending time in Exodus.
The call of Moses to go.
The way that the Lord used this man to free the children of Israel and plunder the Egyptians.
However this week- in my current heart state- I read this particular portion of scripture with sensitivity to the great call the Lord had placed on Moses.
(Have you ever felt that the Lord was calling you to do something unbelievable? inconceivable? )
Let us work our way through this together...
God is speaking to Moses and the bush was burning, yet it was not consumed.
The Lord makes clear to Moses that he is near and is standing on Holy ground.
He has the attention of brother Moses-
Then comes the call...
Exodus 3:10-12
"Come, I will send you to Pharaoh that you may bring my people, the children of Israel, out of Egypt.
But Moses said to God, 'Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt?'
He said 'But I will be with you, and this shall be the sign for you, that I have sent you: when you have brought the people out of Egypt, you shall serve God on this mountain."
Would you have asked the same question that Moses did?
...Who am I that I should go?
We see then that the Lord does not answer Moses' question in the way that he asks but says... "I will be with you"
The Lord has shown Moses that His presence is essential to the call.
It will be God himself and His nearness to enable Moses to carry out this calling.
The Lord then goes on to share with Moses what to say to the elders, the people of Israel and to the Pharaoh.
I cannot imagine what Moses must have been thinking.
...really, Lord? You want me to go and plunder the Pharaoh...
But the Lord tells Moses in verse 18 something unbelievable
"And they will listen to your voice...
and then in verse 22(b) the Lord tells Moses
"..so you shall plunder the Egyptians."
To Moses- this must have been impossible in His mind.
No, Lord- you have the wrong man.
I am exiled.
I am weak.
I am unworthy.
In Exodus chapter 4 verse 10 Moses says
"Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and tongue.
Then the Lord said these words to Moses.
(I imagine these words must be read with authority. The Lord is commanding Moses to go. Guiding with his rod- telling Moses to obey.)
"Who has made man's mouth?
Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing or blind?
Is it not I, the Lord?
Now therefore go, and
I will be your mouth and I will teach you what you shall speak."
I am in tears reading and reflecting on this portion of scripture.
How many times, Oh Lord, have I doubted your ability to work through me?
The Lord does not call the equipped.
He equips the called.
What area of your life right now are you ignoring the Lord's call?
Is He calling you to go?
Is He calling you to give?
Is He calling you to speak?
You see- Moses tried all that he could to get out of this call-
and I would have done the same thing.
I do the same thing.
But see the truth that the Lord speaks over him--
I will be with you.
I have sent you.
I will be your mouth.
I will teach you what you should speak.
I think of the many things that the Lord has placed on my heart to accomplish-
tasks or calls that I avoid or bury deep because they are too daunting, too overwhelming and I do not feel equipped.
But the Lord is not calling me to go alone.
He is calling me to GO with him.
And be a vessel for Him.
A vessel equipped by Him to fulfill His purposes.
WHO ARE WE THAT WE SHOULD GO?
We are sinners who have been offered redemption through the sacrifice of God's only son. We are sons and daughters of the Most High whose purpose is to bring glory to Christ- and this purpose comes with a cost.
There will be cost in the call.
For Moses this cost was great- but obedience to Christ was His call.
What is the Lord calling you to do?
He will equip you to go to the Pharaohs gates.
He will equip you to speak with authority and might.
He will send you with the promise that you do not go alone.
Let us hold fast to our faith in King Jesus-
who reveals Himself, His promises and His purposes to use in our lives through the tasks that He calls us to accomplish- all for His name's sake.
Far from his place of birth.
Exiled from his family.
Tending his flock of sheep in the wilderness.
Suddenly- a great flame appeared and the angel of the Lord spoke to him.
Through a bush.
Ah, Moses.
I have always loved spending time in Exodus.
The call of Moses to go.
The way that the Lord used this man to free the children of Israel and plunder the Egyptians.
However this week- in my current heart state- I read this particular portion of scripture with sensitivity to the great call the Lord had placed on Moses.
(Have you ever felt that the Lord was calling you to do something unbelievable? inconceivable? )
Let us work our way through this together...
God is speaking to Moses and the bush was burning, yet it was not consumed.
The Lord makes clear to Moses that he is near and is standing on Holy ground.
He has the attention of brother Moses-
Then comes the call...
Exodus 3:10-12
"Come, I will send you to Pharaoh that you may bring my people, the children of Israel, out of Egypt.
But Moses said to God, 'Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt?'
He said 'But I will be with you, and this shall be the sign for you, that I have sent you: when you have brought the people out of Egypt, you shall serve God on this mountain."
Would you have asked the same question that Moses did?
...Who am I that I should go?
We see then that the Lord does not answer Moses' question in the way that he asks but says... "I will be with you"
The Lord has shown Moses that His presence is essential to the call.
It will be God himself and His nearness to enable Moses to carry out this calling.
The Lord then goes on to share with Moses what to say to the elders, the people of Israel and to the Pharaoh.
I cannot imagine what Moses must have been thinking.
...really, Lord? You want me to go and plunder the Pharaoh...
But the Lord tells Moses in verse 18 something unbelievable
"And they will listen to your voice...
and then in verse 22(b) the Lord tells Moses
"..so you shall plunder the Egyptians."
To Moses- this must have been impossible in His mind.
No, Lord- you have the wrong man.
I am exiled.
I am weak.
I am unworthy.
In Exodus chapter 4 verse 10 Moses says
"Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and tongue.
Then the Lord said these words to Moses.
(I imagine these words must be read with authority. The Lord is commanding Moses to go. Guiding with his rod- telling Moses to obey.)
"Who has made man's mouth?
Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing or blind?
Is it not I, the Lord?
Now therefore go, and
I will be your mouth and I will teach you what you shall speak."
I am in tears reading and reflecting on this portion of scripture.
How many times, Oh Lord, have I doubted your ability to work through me?
The Lord does not call the equipped.
He equips the called.
What area of your life right now are you ignoring the Lord's call?
Is He calling you to go?
Is He calling you to give?
Is He calling you to speak?
You see- Moses tried all that he could to get out of this call-
and I would have done the same thing.
I do the same thing.
But see the truth that the Lord speaks over him--
I will be with you.
I have sent you.
I will be your mouth.
I will teach you what you should speak.
I think of the many things that the Lord has placed on my heart to accomplish-
tasks or calls that I avoid or bury deep because they are too daunting, too overwhelming and I do not feel equipped.
But the Lord is not calling me to go alone.
He is calling me to GO with him.
And be a vessel for Him.
A vessel equipped by Him to fulfill His purposes.
WHO ARE WE THAT WE SHOULD GO?
We are sinners who have been offered redemption through the sacrifice of God's only son. We are sons and daughters of the Most High whose purpose is to bring glory to Christ- and this purpose comes with a cost.
There will be cost in the call.
For Moses this cost was great- but obedience to Christ was His call.
What is the Lord calling you to do?
He will equip you to go to the Pharaohs gates.
He will equip you to speak with authority and might.
He will send you with the promise that you do not go alone.
Let us hold fast to our faith in King Jesus-
who reveals Himself, His promises and His purposes to use in our lives through the tasks that He calls us to accomplish- all for His name's sake.
Sunday, October 21, 2012
In All That I Have Found
Autumn in my favorite time of year.
Brilliant Weather.
Flannel.
Family gatherings.
Festive Foods.
Something about this season is cozy and perfectly familiar.
This week I celebrated Thanksgiving early.
There was no turkey.
No cornucopia of plastic fruits.
But many thanks.
What?
YES.
I had my own week of thanksgiving with the Lord.
To say that I felt wrapped in the warmth of my Jesus is a start.
I felt His goodness in the chilly mornings.
His beauty was a gift with changing leaves.
His joy in the laughter of people around me.
His nearness to my heart was intoxicating.
Christ in Me- Teaching and loving me.
Unbelievable.
I found myself incredibly excited about things that I often overlook and hardly recognize.
At one point I stopped and said to myself...
This is too good to be true.
It was uncomfortable.
God is, in a way, too close.
He is in my business.
He presence effecting me personally. consistently.
And I LOVE it.
I have been praying for a heart that savors Jesus.
A heart that is stilled at the foot of the cross and focused on Christ.
(How often do we sit down and say "Thank you")
All of my life-I grew up in church singing..
"Thank you for loving and setting me free. Thank you for giving your life just for me. Yes, I thank you. Jesus, I thank you"
But did I sing these words as a redeemed Child of God?
Do I live with this heart of Thanksgiving?
This week I could not help thanking Christ for loving me.
For setting me free.
For giving up His life so that I may live.
He died so that I may live.
....Let's get personal.....
How often do we cry watching movies or reading books and sobbing over a character who has given their life for the sake of another?
All the time.
Sobbing. Heart Broken. Genuinely sad.
YET- we go days- weeks- years
without giving praise and expressing thanksgiving to Christ-
who made Himself nothing so that we may have life.
That is a hard fact to admit.
My pride tries to convince me otherwise.
But the truth is that I do not say thank you enough.
I know this sounds simple-
and perhaps it is just that.
But there is no doubt that many of us, especially myself,
could benefit from adding an intentional time of thanksgiving in our daily routine.
The Lord is doing a number on my heart-
and last week I found myself sobbing in my bed from all of the horrors that are in this world- and the Lord has chosen to spare me from suffering them.
Why not me?
Why them?
I do not know.
But-thanks be to God.
He deserves my affection.
He deserves my adoration.
He deserves "Thank you"
In all that I have found- God is faithful, good and worthy to be praised.
Will you join me in celebrating Thanksgiving early?
And all the time?
Our hearts shall be overjoyed with thanks-
to the point where this thanks becomes a part of our lives-
our lifestyle of worship.
"You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
you have loosed my sackcloth
and clothed me with gladness,
that my glory may sing your praise and not be silent.
O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever!"
Psalm 30:11-12
He is worthy.
-Many Blessings
Some ideas to make it real....
Ways to express Thanksgiving personally:
*Journal of Thanks
There is nothing sweeter than flipping page after page of documented answers to prayer and testimonies of God's faithfulness. I cherish my journals. My heart is on the lines of the pages.
*Verbal Praise
My favorite time to talk with the Lord is in my car.
There are few moments that are sweeter than my verbally communicating to the Lord
"Thank you, Jesus for reconciliation. Thank you, Jesus for forgiveness"
Ways to express Thanksgiving together:
*Thanks Board
I know many families who have a board of "prayers" and "lessons" in their homes.
How about a public board of thanks?
*Writing Thanks
Personally- The Lord has used so many people to reveal Himself to me. What a joy it would be to let these people know that they were a part of God's work in my heart
Brilliant Weather.
Flannel.
Family gatherings.
Festive Foods.
Something about this season is cozy and perfectly familiar.
This week I celebrated Thanksgiving early.
There was no turkey.
No cornucopia of plastic fruits.
But many thanks.
What?
YES.
I had my own week of thanksgiving with the Lord.
To say that I felt wrapped in the warmth of my Jesus is a start.
I felt His goodness in the chilly mornings.
His beauty was a gift with changing leaves.
His joy in the laughter of people around me.
His nearness to my heart was intoxicating.
Christ in Me- Teaching and loving me.
Unbelievable.
I found myself incredibly excited about things that I often overlook and hardly recognize.
At one point I stopped and said to myself...
This is too good to be true.
It was uncomfortable.
God is, in a way, too close.
He is in my business.
He presence effecting me personally. consistently.
And I LOVE it.
I have been praying for a heart that savors Jesus.
A heart that is stilled at the foot of the cross and focused on Christ.
(How often do we sit down and say "Thank you")
All of my life-I grew up in church singing..
"Thank you for loving and setting me free. Thank you for giving your life just for me. Yes, I thank you. Jesus, I thank you"
But did I sing these words as a redeemed Child of God?
Do I live with this heart of Thanksgiving?
This week I could not help thanking Christ for loving me.
For setting me free.
For giving up His life so that I may live.
He died so that I may live.
....Let's get personal.....
How often do we cry watching movies or reading books and sobbing over a character who has given their life for the sake of another?
All the time.
Sobbing. Heart Broken. Genuinely sad.
YET- we go days- weeks- years
without giving praise and expressing thanksgiving to Christ-
who made Himself nothing so that we may have life.
That is a hard fact to admit.
My pride tries to convince me otherwise.
But the truth is that I do not say thank you enough.
I know this sounds simple-
and perhaps it is just that.
But there is no doubt that many of us, especially myself,
could benefit from adding an intentional time of thanksgiving in our daily routine.
The Lord is doing a number on my heart-
and last week I found myself sobbing in my bed from all of the horrors that are in this world- and the Lord has chosen to spare me from suffering them.
Why not me?
Why them?
I do not know.
But-thanks be to God.
He deserves my affection.
He deserves my adoration.
He deserves "Thank you"
In all that I have found- God is faithful, good and worthy to be praised.
Will you join me in celebrating Thanksgiving early?
And all the time?
Our hearts shall be overjoyed with thanks-
to the point where this thanks becomes a part of our lives-
our lifestyle of worship.
"You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
you have loosed my sackcloth
and clothed me with gladness,
that my glory may sing your praise and not be silent.
O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever!"
Psalm 30:11-12
He is worthy.
-Many Blessings
Some ideas to make it real....
Ways to express Thanksgiving personally:
*Journal of Thanks
There is nothing sweeter than flipping page after page of documented answers to prayer and testimonies of God's faithfulness. I cherish my journals. My heart is on the lines of the pages.
*Verbal Praise
My favorite time to talk with the Lord is in my car.
There are few moments that are sweeter than my verbally communicating to the Lord
"Thank you, Jesus for reconciliation. Thank you, Jesus for forgiveness"
Ways to express Thanksgiving together:
*Thanks Board
I know many families who have a board of "prayers" and "lessons" in their homes.
How about a public board of thanks?
*Writing Thanks
Personally- The Lord has used so many people to reveal Himself to me. What a joy it would be to let these people know that they were a part of God's work in my heart
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Letting Go Of The List
I am stubborn.
I like to have a plan.
I try to do it all on my own.
Why?
Because on many days I believe in my heart of hearts that I can handle it.
I think that I can collaborate with myself- and sometimes the Lord- and get it all worked out without having to go outside of me.
I do not always do this out of pride-
often I try to handle things on my own so that I can lift a burden from family members or try and withhold heart ache from people that I love.
I can be the strong kid who does not cry in front of a crowd when tribulation comes.
I can hold it in until I am on my own or crying with my best friends on the phone.
I enjoy and find comfort in control.
In this same "control" mindset-
I am a list maker.
A note taker.
I find comfort in starting my day knowing what needs to be done before I lay my head down in the evenings.
Those who spend lots of time around me know this to be the case.
During some event seasons it seems that I am in possesion of a clip board with a sharpie pen more than I am likely to be found wearing shoes.
I rely heavily on being organized and having my schedule.
This is not always a bad thing-
but lately I have been convicted of my reliance on these lists and independence of spirit.
The Lord has revealed to me the danger in this independence and need for my plans to be seen to completion- and done all in my own power.
I am in the midst of a wonderful study-
PLUG: you should all read "Instruments in the Redeemers Hands" by Paul David Tripp and even further should do the "Instruments in the Redeemers Hands: How to help others change Study Guide" by P.D. Tripp.
Solid. Quality. Worth your time.
PLUG OVER.
This study intrigued me because more than I love to help myself-
I LOVE to help people.
It is my joy.
The first couple of weeks have focused on how to prepare our hearts to be "people of change".
I was quickly convicted.
I am not truly a person of change unless I am willing to be changed-
from the inside out.
Being changed from the inside out requires the giving up of command.
The passing of the baton.
SURRENDER of SELF.
If I am not constantly surrendering myself to the Lord and examining where I am struggling I will be a vision of
Hebrews 3:12-13
"Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today", that none of you may be hardened by deceitfulness of sin."
Taking control of my life into my own hands is progressively dangerous.
How may I be used in the lives of others when I am spiritually blind?
Stay with me- prayerfully this will come full circle.
Relying on self results in relying on my own strength and ability.
In my own strength-
I am exhausted.
I cannot do it.
I am not enough.
And y'all...I am not always trying to rely on myself to do selfish things.
I try to serve the Lord without the Lords strength-
every. day.
I often find myself in the situation where I am doing things for people- serving them- and wearing myself out.
I do not know how to say no or let myself ask for help.
I toss and turn at night trying to work out wisdom for a friend in my head without asking the Lord for guidance and wisdom- excruciating!
Are you with me?
This need for control has got to go.
My TOTAL reliance on my list must let up.
In the loudest way the Lord showed up in worship this past Sunday-
our pastor was teaching on Colossians 1:24-29.
One of the verses that we meditated and focused on was verse 29.
"For this I toil, struggle with all his energy that he powerfully works within me"
Notice that toiling and struggling was not removed-
but look once more at from whom the energy to survive this toiling and struggling is being received.
From me?
Nope.
It is HIS energy IN ME.
Earlier in the passage in verse 27 it says that Christ IN us is the hope of glory.
Not Christ with me.
Not me plus Christ.
BUT
CHRIST IN ME
The only HOPE OF GLORY.
Yes- I will toil- be exhausted-
worn out and emptied-
but with all of HIS energy he will powerfully work WITHIN ME.
My desire is to proclaim Christ with my life and to daily be an instrument of change in the lives of others- but this will not happen until I surrender my control and admit my need for Jesus.
THEN- and only then-
will I see my tasks as a joy from the Lord and know that I can tackle them with confidence for Christ is in me and will do a mighty work within me.
Equipping me to fulfill His purposes for His glory.
There is nothing wrong with a list-
and I will continue to make them...
but with a different heart.
I cannot do it on my own or in my own strength.
I can have a plan but always have a heart willing for my road ahead to be shifted and changed.
I can be exhausted but not because I am trying to conquer the world on my own.
I will never be a light until I turn myself to Jesus.
There is simply no other way to be a person of change and vessel of the Gospel.
My prayers this week are:
1. That I am intentional in daily VERBALLY submitting my ways to Christ
*I use time in my car to talk with the Lord. It is a built in time of quiet every day to be at His feet.
2. That I make time to spend time with the Lord for the sake of knowing Him more- not just to check my daily reading off the list or to prepare to teach a study
*I study best at night. I enjoy a hot cup of decaf coffee, empty journal pages and sweet time with the Lord in His word.
3. That I am intentional and prayerful about my life communicating Christ to those around me
*All of our lives are communicating something. What does your life communicate?
Brothers and Sisters- may we hold each other accountable in reminding those close to our hearts to rely on Christ- and not ourselves. We will fail us- our God is infallible.
Let's humble ourselves before the Almighty- that is where we will find true rest and true control.
"For what we proclaim is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, with ourselves as your servants for Jesus' sake" 2 Corinthians 4:5
-
I like to have a plan.
I try to do it all on my own.
Why?
Because on many days I believe in my heart of hearts that I can handle it.
I think that I can collaborate with myself- and sometimes the Lord- and get it all worked out without having to go outside of me.
I do not always do this out of pride-
often I try to handle things on my own so that I can lift a burden from family members or try and withhold heart ache from people that I love.
I can be the strong kid who does not cry in front of a crowd when tribulation comes.
I can hold it in until I am on my own or crying with my best friends on the phone.
I enjoy and find comfort in control.
In this same "control" mindset-
I am a list maker.
A note taker.
I find comfort in starting my day knowing what needs to be done before I lay my head down in the evenings.
Those who spend lots of time around me know this to be the case.
During some event seasons it seems that I am in possesion of a clip board with a sharpie pen more than I am likely to be found wearing shoes.
I rely heavily on being organized and having my schedule.
This is not always a bad thing-
but lately I have been convicted of my reliance on these lists and independence of spirit.
The Lord has revealed to me the danger in this independence and need for my plans to be seen to completion- and done all in my own power.
I am in the midst of a wonderful study-
PLUG: you should all read "Instruments in the Redeemers Hands" by Paul David Tripp and even further should do the "Instruments in the Redeemers Hands: How to help others change Study Guide" by P.D. Tripp.
Solid. Quality. Worth your time.
PLUG OVER.
This study intrigued me because more than I love to help myself-
I LOVE to help people.
It is my joy.
The first couple of weeks have focused on how to prepare our hearts to be "people of change".
I was quickly convicted.
I am not truly a person of change unless I am willing to be changed-
from the inside out.
Being changed from the inside out requires the giving up of command.
The passing of the baton.
SURRENDER of SELF.
If I am not constantly surrendering myself to the Lord and examining where I am struggling I will be a vision of
Hebrews 3:12-13
"Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today", that none of you may be hardened by deceitfulness of sin."
Taking control of my life into my own hands is progressively dangerous.
How may I be used in the lives of others when I am spiritually blind?
Stay with me- prayerfully this will come full circle.
Relying on self results in relying on my own strength and ability.
In my own strength-
I am exhausted.
I cannot do it.
I am not enough.
And y'all...I am not always trying to rely on myself to do selfish things.
I try to serve the Lord without the Lords strength-
every. day.
I often find myself in the situation where I am doing things for people- serving them- and wearing myself out.
I do not know how to say no or let myself ask for help.
I toss and turn at night trying to work out wisdom for a friend in my head without asking the Lord for guidance and wisdom- excruciating!
Are you with me?
This need for control has got to go.
My TOTAL reliance on my list must let up.
In the loudest way the Lord showed up in worship this past Sunday-
our pastor was teaching on Colossians 1:24-29.
One of the verses that we meditated and focused on was verse 29.
"For this I toil, struggle with all his energy that he powerfully works within me"
Notice that toiling and struggling was not removed-
but look once more at from whom the energy to survive this toiling and struggling is being received.
From me?
Nope.
It is HIS energy IN ME.
Earlier in the passage in verse 27 it says that Christ IN us is the hope of glory.
Not Christ with me.
Not me plus Christ.
BUT
CHRIST IN ME
The only HOPE OF GLORY.
Yes- I will toil- be exhausted-
worn out and emptied-
but with all of HIS energy he will powerfully work WITHIN ME.
My desire is to proclaim Christ with my life and to daily be an instrument of change in the lives of others- but this will not happen until I surrender my control and admit my need for Jesus.
THEN- and only then-
will I see my tasks as a joy from the Lord and know that I can tackle them with confidence for Christ is in me and will do a mighty work within me.
Equipping me to fulfill His purposes for His glory.
There is nothing wrong with a list-
and I will continue to make them...
but with a different heart.
I cannot do it on my own or in my own strength.
I can have a plan but always have a heart willing for my road ahead to be shifted and changed.
I can be exhausted but not because I am trying to conquer the world on my own.
I will never be a light until I turn myself to Jesus.
There is simply no other way to be a person of change and vessel of the Gospel.
My prayers this week are:
1. That I am intentional in daily VERBALLY submitting my ways to Christ
*I use time in my car to talk with the Lord. It is a built in time of quiet every day to be at His feet.
2. That I make time to spend time with the Lord for the sake of knowing Him more- not just to check my daily reading off the list or to prepare to teach a study
*I study best at night. I enjoy a hot cup of decaf coffee, empty journal pages and sweet time with the Lord in His word.
3. That I am intentional and prayerful about my life communicating Christ to those around me
*All of our lives are communicating something. What does your life communicate?
Brothers and Sisters- may we hold each other accountable in reminding those close to our hearts to rely on Christ- and not ourselves. We will fail us- our God is infallible.
Let's humble ourselves before the Almighty- that is where we will find true rest and true control.
"For what we proclaim is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, with ourselves as your servants for Jesus' sake" 2 Corinthians 4:5
-
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Within the veil
I walked in from work on Tuesday and came straight onto the back porch with my journal.
Finally- all of my thoughts & prayers were on the tip of my tongue!
These words are bursting at the seams.
I promise you- if they are not put to paper my eyes may just pop out.
___________________________________________________
A haze.
If I were to describe my spirit over the season of the last few weeks that is all I can come up with.
The Byrd house has been busy.
Family. Friends. Work. Serve. Events. Parties. Football. And repeat.
There have been moments when I feel motivated and refreshed.
Yet- after the passing of a day I feel a sort shadow.
Not because I am tired (even though I am!) but more my spirit is in an unsettled place.
What is this?
I still have not figured it out.
Ido not like...despise the dark.
When I was in elementary school I had a recurring dream.
I was walking down the road at our family farm- bright stars and full moon-
And then a point in the road came where there was a thick fog.
I could not see the steps in front of me.
What was ahead was a mystery and if I moved forward it would be in complete blindness.
I always woke up without taking the step.
(If the dream had gone further I am sure I would have turned around and run back to “safety”)
This is the same sort of uncertainty that I am feeling now.
The days ahead are a haze.
A thick cloud of uncertainty and unseen territory.
I was reminded earlier in the week as I was thinking through this scenario that
the haze is not necessarily a bad, dangerous or frightening thing.
It is the idea of the fog, or what may be within it, that pushes us to fear.
It is the uneasiness of seemingly unsteady ground that makes us stop in our path and want to run to comfort.
But..
“..we are always of good courage…for we walk by faith, not by sight” ( from 2 Corinthians 5:6-7)
I am so addicted to and dependent on MY sight.
However- the Lord is showing me, in an uncomfortable way, what being blind will let me see.
Are you with me?
This passed Monday during a time of worship a chorus of a familiar hymn struck me
with great might:
“When darkness seems to hide His face
I rest on His unchanging grace
In every high and stormy gale
My anchor holds within the veil “
With tears in my eyes I was tenderly reminded by our sweet Abba Father of His unchanging grace in the midst of uncertainty.
Even within the veil, my anchor holds.
I can REST in Him
I will not be moved.
Here I sit on the porch with the most precious and perfect breeze crossing my face and I am overwhelmed with the presence of my anchor.
What lies ahead of me, no matter seen or unseen, will not consume me or take me under.
The darkness does not have to bring me to fear if I remember with whom I am walking with and towards.
Yes, Lord.
Our anchor holds within the veil.
My challenge to you this day is to pray for the boldness and obedience to Christ to follow him into the fog.
He will certainly lead us into unfamiliar territory- and we are called to follow.
The Lord will ask of us things that are without worldly assurance- but He will equip us with all that we need to fulfill His purposes.
As I mentioned earlier- I think that the little girl in my dream would have turned around and run for comfort if the dream had continued.
However- this little girl that sits here and types these words is praying for the Lord to give her the boldness to step into the fog and walk boldly- knowing that my anchor holds and His grace is sufficient for this sheep.
Trust the Lord in the haze.
Do not let it stop you from taking steps forward or following where the Lord is leading.
Allow it to be used to draw you closer to our Heavenly Father.
“I pray for you, that all your misgivings will be melted to thanksgivings. Remember that the shadow a thing casts often far exceeds the size of the thing itself (especially if the light be low on the horizon) and though some future fear may strut brave darkness as you approach, the thing itself will be but a speck when seen from beyond. Oh that He would restore us often with that 'aspect from beyond,' to see a thing as He sees it, to remember that He dealeth with us as with sons.”
― Jim Elliot
Finally- all of my thoughts & prayers were on the tip of my tongue!
These words are bursting at the seams.
I promise you- if they are not put to paper my eyes may just pop out.
___________________________________________________
A haze.
If I were to describe my spirit over the season of the last few weeks that is all I can come up with.
The Byrd house has been busy.
Family. Friends. Work. Serve. Events. Parties. Football. And repeat.
There have been moments when I feel motivated and refreshed.
Yet- after the passing of a day I feel a sort shadow.
Not because I am tired (even though I am!) but more my spirit is in an unsettled place.
What is this?
I still have not figured it out.
I
When I was in elementary school I had a recurring dream.
I was walking down the road at our family farm- bright stars and full moon-
And then a point in the road came where there was a thick fog.
I could not see the steps in front of me.
What was ahead was a mystery and if I moved forward it would be in complete blindness.
I always woke up without taking the step.
(If the dream had gone further I am sure I would have turned around and run back to “safety”)
This is the same sort of uncertainty that I am feeling now.
The days ahead are a haze.
A thick cloud of uncertainty and unseen territory.
I was reminded earlier in the week as I was thinking through this scenario that
the haze is not necessarily a bad, dangerous or frightening thing.
It is the idea of the fog, or what may be within it, that pushes us to fear.
It is the uneasiness of seemingly unsteady ground that makes us stop in our path and want to run to comfort.
But..
“..we are always of good courage…for we walk by faith, not by sight” ( from 2 Corinthians 5:6-7)
I am so addicted to and dependent on MY sight.
However- the Lord is showing me, in an uncomfortable way, what being blind will let me see.
Are you with me?
This passed Monday during a time of worship a chorus of a familiar hymn struck me
with great might:
“When darkness seems to hide His face
I rest on His unchanging grace
In every high and stormy gale
My anchor holds within the veil “
With tears in my eyes I was tenderly reminded by our sweet Abba Father of His unchanging grace in the midst of uncertainty.
Even within the veil, my anchor holds.
I can REST in Him
I will not be moved.
Here I sit on the porch with the most precious and perfect breeze crossing my face and I am overwhelmed with the presence of my anchor.
What lies ahead of me, no matter seen or unseen, will not consume me or take me under.
The darkness does not have to bring me to fear if I remember with whom I am walking with and towards.
Yes, Lord.
Our anchor holds within the veil.
My challenge to you this day is to pray for the boldness and obedience to Christ to follow him into the fog.
He will certainly lead us into unfamiliar territory- and we are called to follow.
The Lord will ask of us things that are without worldly assurance- but He will equip us with all that we need to fulfill His purposes.
As I mentioned earlier- I think that the little girl in my dream would have turned around and run for comfort if the dream had continued.
However- this little girl that sits here and types these words is praying for the Lord to give her the boldness to step into the fog and walk boldly- knowing that my anchor holds and His grace is sufficient for this sheep.
Trust the Lord in the haze.
Do not let it stop you from taking steps forward or following where the Lord is leading.
Allow it to be used to draw you closer to our Heavenly Father.
“I pray for you, that all your misgivings will be melted to thanksgivings. Remember that the shadow a thing casts often far exceeds the size of the thing itself (especially if the light be low on the horizon) and though some future fear may strut brave darkness as you approach, the thing itself will be but a speck when seen from beyond. Oh that He would restore us often with that 'aspect from beyond,' to see a thing as He sees it, to remember that He dealeth with us as with sons.”
― Jim Elliot
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
It's Personal
We live in a world of convenience.
People will do anything to speed up a process in order for it not to disrupt or off rail their schedules or comfort.
Unfortunately- this is often the mind set that many believers have in serving others.
I am so burdened for the church.
I do not speak of all- but I speak of many who are not willing to let ministry mingle with their schedules, banks accounts or bucket lists.
I have seen these tendencies in my own life.
The Lord is reminding me- over and over again- that serving Him fully will fully effect my life in all areas.
O- that I would let the Lord use me.
To disrupt my schedule to do His will.
To rip me out of my comfort zone and heave me into the mess.
I can only think of Jesus.
Son of God. King of Kings.
Came to earth to live and die so that we may have life.
Speaking of coming into a mess.
I have been spending a lot of time reading & studying Tim Keller's book called "Ministries of Mercy". It often refers to the parable of the good samaritan.
Have we not all read this parable a few dozen times?
Colored pictures of the man on the road in Sunday School for ages?
Told this story ourselves in vacation bible school to children?
Well- Let me refresh your memory like I have had mine refreshed.
It struck me and I have not gotten over it.
Luke 10:30-37 says
30 Jesus replied, “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, who stripped him and beat him and departed, leaving him half dead.
31 Now by chance a priest was going down that road, and when he saw him he passed by on the other side.
32 So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side.
33 But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion.
34 He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him.
35 And the next day he took out two denarii[a] and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, ‘Take care of him, and whatever more you spend, I will repay you when I come back.’
36 Which of these three, do you think, proved to be a neighbor to the man who fell among the robbers?”
37 He said, “The one who showed him mercy.” And Jesus said to him, “You go, and do likewise.”
Ring a bell? Yes, the story we have heard our whole lives.
But Tim Keller puts in in perspective when he says in "Ministries of Mercy" (page 11)
"Our paradigm is the Samaritan who:
Risked His safety
Destroyed His Schedule and
Became Bloody an Dirty through personal involvement with a needy person..."
Wow.
Are we ready?
Are we willing?
Are we obeying the command to love our neighbor as we love ourselves?
Are we ready to meet the needs of others as eagerly as we are to meet our own?
Jesus is clear in His command-
See the Samaritan and the mercy he showed?
GO- and do likewise.
My prayer today is that we strive for a heart like the man on the road from Jerusalem to Jericho. That we allow the Lord to disrupt our schedules and break our comfort so that we may act as Christ in the lives of others.
Ministry is not convenient. Ministry is not safe or clean or pretty.
Ministry is personal. costly. involved.
Brothers and Sisters- Let us let the Lord use us for His good.
Many Blessings-
“Trying to do the Lord's work in your own strength is the most confusing, exhausting, and tedious of all work. But when you are filled with the Holy Spirit, then the ministry of Jesus just flows out of you.”
― Corrie Ten Boom
People will do anything to speed up a process in order for it not to disrupt or off rail their schedules or comfort.
Unfortunately- this is often the mind set that many believers have in serving others.
I am so burdened for the church.
I do not speak of all- but I speak of many who are not willing to let ministry mingle with their schedules, banks accounts or bucket lists.
I have seen these tendencies in my own life.
The Lord is reminding me- over and over again- that serving Him fully will fully effect my life in all areas.
O- that I would let the Lord use me.
To disrupt my schedule to do His will.
To rip me out of my comfort zone and heave me into the mess.
I can only think of Jesus.
Son of God. King of Kings.
Came to earth to live and die so that we may have life.
Speaking of coming into a mess.
I have been spending a lot of time reading & studying Tim Keller's book called "Ministries of Mercy". It often refers to the parable of the good samaritan.
Have we not all read this parable a few dozen times?
Colored pictures of the man on the road in Sunday School for ages?
Told this story ourselves in vacation bible school to children?
Well- Let me refresh your memory like I have had mine refreshed.
It struck me and I have not gotten over it.
Luke 10:30-37 says
30 Jesus replied, “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, who stripped him and beat him and departed, leaving him half dead.
31 Now by chance a priest was going down that road, and when he saw him he passed by on the other side.
32 So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side.
33 But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion.
34 He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him.
35 And the next day he took out two denarii[a] and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, ‘Take care of him, and whatever more you spend, I will repay you when I come back.’
36 Which of these three, do you think, proved to be a neighbor to the man who fell among the robbers?”
37 He said, “The one who showed him mercy.” And Jesus said to him, “You go, and do likewise.”
Ring a bell? Yes, the story we have heard our whole lives.
But Tim Keller puts in in perspective when he says in "Ministries of Mercy" (page 11)
"Our paradigm is the Samaritan who:
Risked His safety
Destroyed His Schedule and
Became Bloody an Dirty through personal involvement with a needy person..."
Wow.
Are we ready?
Are we willing?
Are we obeying the command to love our neighbor as we love ourselves?
Are we ready to meet the needs of others as eagerly as we are to meet our own?
Jesus is clear in His command-
See the Samaritan and the mercy he showed?
GO- and do likewise.
My prayer today is that we strive for a heart like the man on the road from Jerusalem to Jericho. That we allow the Lord to disrupt our schedules and break our comfort so that we may act as Christ in the lives of others.
Ministry is not convenient. Ministry is not safe or clean or pretty.
Ministry is personal. costly. involved.
Brothers and Sisters- Let us let the Lord use us for His good.
Many Blessings-
“Trying to do the Lord's work in your own strength is the most confusing, exhausting, and tedious of all work. But when you are filled with the Holy Spirit, then the ministry of Jesus just flows out of you.”
― Corrie Ten Boom
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