STORM.
One has just ended. One is coming.
Many are ahead. Many are behind us.
The word STORM has come up more times that I would like to recount in the passed week.
In nature. In family. In friendships. In my relationship with the Lord.
What are these storms? What will I learn from them? How will they change me?
This time pondering storms began with in this moment:
Last week I went to the First Light shelter in Birmingham and spent some time talking with and loving on the women of this ministry.
A sweet woman, lets call her Gladice, was sharing with me her testimony. Filled with abuse and despair- Gladice’s life is one that has had many a storm.
This sweet sister looked at me with tear-filled eyes and grabbed my hands. She then said a phrase that dug its way quickly to my core…
“Little girl- Storms ARE coming in life. Big and small- we can’t hide from them. I have tried- they force there way in. But God is with us in them. Saves us from them.
The storms aren’t as scary knowing we always have Jesus to cover our heads and keep us from harm”
Incredible. Re-read that. Truth in those words.
I love words and knowing the meaning of them.
Definition of Storm-
Noun: A violent disturbance of the atmosphere with strong winds and usually rain, thunder, lightning, or snow.
Verb: Move angrily or forcefully in a specified direction
Synonyms of Storm:
Tempest. Gale. Assault. Rage.
All negative.
Angry. Disturbing. Strong. Rage. Specific.
I cannot name one “storm” in my life that I have craved.
I have never cried out to the Lord…Send a violent season to me! Disturb my days! Specifically bring destruction and hurt to my life!
None the less- Storms have come. God has been good- never failed me.
And at the end of each storm a lesson was learned and a heart was molded to look more like Jesus and less like this world.
God allows the storms. Uses them in our lives to humble us, draw us to Himself, and remind us that He is a refuge for us.
I think of the storms that are going on in my life and spirit right now-
Some are heavier than others- All of them are keeping me up at night.
((( Venting time- Night time is when the storms are the hardest for me to bear. I worry. I do not sleep. The “thunder” is the loudest then.)))
Now… for the HOPE in the STORMS that I, more than ever, need to be reminded of.
Luke 8:22-25
Jesus Calms a Storm
" 22 One day he got into a boat with his disciples, and he said to them, “Let us go across to the other side of the lake.” So they set out, 23 and as they sailed he fell asleep. And a windstorm came down on the lake, and they were filling with water and were in danger. 24 And they went and woke him, saying, “Master, Master, we are perishing!” And he awoke and rebuked the wind and the raging waves, and they ceased, and there was a calm. 25 He said to them, “Where is your faith?” And they were afraid, and they marveled, saying to one another, “Who then is this, that he commands even winds and water, and they obey him?”
I read this just this morning and got so frustrated with the men in the boat.
Why didn’t they just trust Jesus to calm the storm?
Why did they believe that they were perishing when Jesus was right beside them?
They knew He could do it. They knew He was in control.
They knew that in His time the storm would pass and they would be safe.
Why in the world didn’t they trust him?
I put my hazelnut coffee down on the coffee table.
Stood up.
Looked at myself in the mirror… (Literally…judge not)
And said…
“Amy. Marie. Houston. Byrd.
Why are you not trusting Jesus to calm the storms.
You know He can do it. You know He is in control.
You know that in His time the storm will pass and you will be safe.
Why in the WORLD aren’t you trusting him?”
Y’all. Why is it so hard to live out daily the hope we HAVE in Jesus?
People will Leave. Fail. Disappoint. Hurt.
Jesus will not.
Life will be complicated. Ever changing. Unpredictable.
Jesus is never-changing.
Storms will Pound us. Move us. Scare us.
Jesus will be refuge.
I guess in all of this I am trying to say to you-
What are your storms?
Don’t say you don’t have any. You do. You will.
To quote Gladice- “Storms ARE coming. Big and Small”
One of my dearest friends, Kelsie, and I were running errands this passed Saturday and found ourselves in the midst of a conversation that both encouraged me and drew me quickly to the feet of Jesus.
We just both admitted that we have know clue what life the Lord has ahead of us. We know that there will be difficult days where we feel like we have been defeated.
We know many days will be filled with joy and blessings. And the unknown was almost too much for either of us to verbalize....however...we both encouraged and reminded each other that our Savior has gone before us and made a way.
Our God will prepare us for the storms. He will be with us in all of our days and as we take each of our steps.
I pray that today as you weather the storms that may consume your heart that you may find hope in Christ who is our refuge and strength. That we could place our trust in a God whose timing is infallible and whose plan is intentional. Our God is ever present in our time of need. Lean on Him. Let Him hold you up and be your strength.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Sunday, January 15, 2012
Free at last...
"Oh Lord- surely you would not ask me to give up these plans. This person. This dream."
"Father- you would certainly not ask of me to let go of such an incredible opportunity"
"Jesus- you would not ask of me to say goodbye to something I hold so dear"
Welcome, brothers and sisters, into the depths of my most recent prayers and cries of my heart.
God is teaching me what it is to surrender.
What it feels like to let go of things that I am holding in my hands so tightly...
to release my grip would is quite a task...
What are these things I am holding to so tightly you ask?
They are quite simple, really.
Have you ever prayed to our Lord and said...
"Father, Use me! Send me! However- please do not send me anywhere where I cannot easily communicate with my family or the ones I love..."
or...
"Dear Lord, Here I am. Take my life at any cost. But please do not ask me to give up my dreams of becoming...etc...etc..."
I am SO often conditional in my surrender.
But by definition- surrender has no conditions.
If I am to surrender-I am to SURRENDER ALL.
Give it up.
Pass it along.
Open my grip and keep my hand flat and fingers apart.
This task is one that can be done only by the help of a God who honors obedience and asks us to trust Him with our spirits and souls.
WHAT ARE YOU HOLDING SO TIGHTLY?
A relationship? A dream? A fear? An opportunity?
I had the opportunity to go to Passion in Atlanta two weeks ago and worship with 45,000 of my closest friends and neighbors.
Overwhelming to say the least.
On the first night of worship- as I sat in the very tip top of the Georgia dome- the Lord placed in front of me an anthem...
Specifically for me. (Out of all those people...neat huh?)
LET IT BE MY JOY TO SAY...YOUR WILL...YOUR WAY...ALWAYS.
My mouth dropped. I could not sing these words- not until I swallowed what my words meant.
This is exactly the kind of prayer I have been avoiding.
I was moved to see the words cross the screen-
and honestly ticked off that the Lord was picking on me.
Getting to me in a place where I can all but avoid exactly what He was trying to tell me.
"Amy- Give up. Surrender. Follow me. Trust me."
I would love to say that my desires and the Lord's always parallel-
that MY WAY and the LORDS WAY are always the same.
But that is most often not the case.
The Lord's way is tried and true a better way. The best way.
However-it is so hard to give up our plans and the ways that we saw our lives to play out...
I cannot help but think of Paul.
Did this brother in Christ imagine that one day God would place Him in a jail cell?
Was this a part of Paul's (or younger Saul's) dream?
I doubt it.
Somewhere along Paul's journey he grasped a concept that I so desperately want to cling to myself-
To live is Christ. To die is gain.
Here these words of SURRENDER that he wrote while in a jail cell-
But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith—that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead.
(Philippians 3:7-11 ESV)
O. My. Word.
Father may my heart me so in tune with your very spirit that I can truly count EVERYTHING as a loss.
Because you are worthy.
Letting go will be tough. My hands being opened and forced a part will be trying-
but at the end of that process there will be a life that is totally surrendered to the will of a God who is intentional and good.
Father God- Loosen my grip. Help me trust you and count all that I consider dear a loss compared to You. In you there is life abundant and all that I need. My very spirit is not mine- but is yours to mold, lead, guide and move. Have your way in me. Restore my soul for your name sake. Amen.
Free at last, I surrender all I am with opened hands.
"Father- you would certainly not ask of me to let go of such an incredible opportunity"
"Jesus- you would not ask of me to say goodbye to something I hold so dear"
Welcome, brothers and sisters, into the depths of my most recent prayers and cries of my heart.
God is teaching me what it is to surrender.
What it feels like to let go of things that I am holding in my hands so tightly...
to release my grip would is quite a task...
What are these things I am holding to so tightly you ask?
They are quite simple, really.
Have you ever prayed to our Lord and said...
"Father, Use me! Send me! However- please do not send me anywhere where I cannot easily communicate with my family or the ones I love..."
or...
"Dear Lord, Here I am. Take my life at any cost. But please do not ask me to give up my dreams of becoming...etc...etc..."
I am SO often conditional in my surrender.
But by definition- surrender has no conditions.
If I am to surrender-I am to SURRENDER ALL.
Give it up.
Pass it along.
Open my grip and keep my hand flat and fingers apart.
This task is one that can be done only by the help of a God who honors obedience and asks us to trust Him with our spirits and souls.
WHAT ARE YOU HOLDING SO TIGHTLY?
A relationship? A dream? A fear? An opportunity?
I had the opportunity to go to Passion in Atlanta two weeks ago and worship with 45,000 of my closest friends and neighbors.
Overwhelming to say the least.
On the first night of worship- as I sat in the very tip top of the Georgia dome- the Lord placed in front of me an anthem...
Specifically for me. (Out of all those people...neat huh?)
LET IT BE MY JOY TO SAY...YOUR WILL...YOUR WAY...ALWAYS.
My mouth dropped. I could not sing these words- not until I swallowed what my words meant.
This is exactly the kind of prayer I have been avoiding.
I was moved to see the words cross the screen-
and honestly ticked off that the Lord was picking on me.
Getting to me in a place where I can all but avoid exactly what He was trying to tell me.
"Amy- Give up. Surrender. Follow me. Trust me."
I would love to say that my desires and the Lord's always parallel-
that MY WAY and the LORDS WAY are always the same.
But that is most often not the case.
The Lord's way is tried and true a better way. The best way.
However-it is so hard to give up our plans and the ways that we saw our lives to play out...
I cannot help but think of Paul.
Did this brother in Christ imagine that one day God would place Him in a jail cell?
Was this a part of Paul's (or younger Saul's) dream?
I doubt it.
Somewhere along Paul's journey he grasped a concept that I so desperately want to cling to myself-
To live is Christ. To die is gain.
Here these words of SURRENDER that he wrote while in a jail cell-
But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which comes through faith in Christ, the righteousness from God that depends on faith—that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead.
(Philippians 3:7-11 ESV)
O. My. Word.
Father may my heart me so in tune with your very spirit that I can truly count EVERYTHING as a loss.
Because you are worthy.
Letting go will be tough. My hands being opened and forced a part will be trying-
but at the end of that process there will be a life that is totally surrendered to the will of a God who is intentional and good.
Father God- Loosen my grip. Help me trust you and count all that I consider dear a loss compared to You. In you there is life abundant and all that I need. My very spirit is not mine- but is yours to mold, lead, guide and move. Have your way in me. Restore my soul for your name sake. Amen.
Free at last, I surrender all I am with opened hands.
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